Score more likes, share one of these… 20 Priceless Facebook Statuses: Jack The Ripper would be a great name for a fitness trainer. Facebook posts with 12 hashtags, who the f*ck are you trying to reach? All the popular baby names you hate while pregnant will be the names of your child’s friends and classmates. We […]
Betty White Flash Mob, Angry Girls, and 20 Awesome Facebook Status Updates
Happy MLK Day, make someone smile, share one of these.. 20 Awesome Facebook Status Updates: I really want to have fun today. Because tomorrow is going to be a nightmare. If I don’t snapchat u back its not because I’m ignoring you it’s because my face isn’t cooperating. My Hobbies: – switching between the same three apps […]
Dancing Cow, Algebra, and Witty Status Posts
Make your weekend last longer, share one of these.. Top 20 Witty Weekend Status Posts: A foot away from me it’s very cold outside… thank you house. Art is how we decorate space; music is how we decorate time. Don’t call me. Alcohol you later! my hobbies: – switching between the same three apps for […]
Hot Lava, McDonalds Sauce, and 20 Fantastic Facebook Statuses
Make someone blow some air out of their nose, share one of these.. 20 Fantastic Facebook Statuses: That awkward moment when you walk in a room and forget what you needed, so you awkwardly walk away looking confused. I can’t get out bed. These blankets have accepted me as one of their own and if […]
Therapist, Limbo Prank, and 20 Wednesday Status Updates
Get over hump day, share one of these.. 20 Wednesday Status Updates: Wed. Nes. Day. How I have to say it in my head to spell it every damn time. We should start keeping giraffes a secret from young children. Imagine discovering giraffes exist when you were like 15. “Woah! Check out that long necked […]
Bedtime, Squeaky Toy, & Really Good Status Updates
Get a smile and a like from your friends, share one of these.. 20 Stupid Funny Status Updates: I’m pretty much always down for a snack. If you don’t have anything nice to say, you’re probably just being realistic. I can’t take my jacket off because it’s part of my outfit, you idiot. Are they […]