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Silly Facebook Status Updates:
- You can’t have a relationship without any fights, but you can make your relationship worth the fight.
- How do some people manage to sit on it and talk out of it at the same time?
- Watching Netflix before going to bed is the adult equivalent of being read a bedtime story.
- Note to self: Never make a sarcastic remark to someone who is really angry, unless you’re prepared to run like hell.
- Only kids count sheep to fall asleep. Count your debts, your mistakes, your heartache and cry yourself to sleep like a grownup.
- I don’t need a reason to do stupid things, just a venue.
- Unsure if life is getting better or the amount of craps I give is decreasing.
- I was just thinking…Then I thought “why?”. So there will be no more thinking today.
- Life’s too short to wake up in a bad mood- I save mine until I get to work.
- I never give the wrong answer; sometimes I am simply asked the wrong question.
- Whenever I don’t hear from someone in a while I think, “Oh, shit. They found out.”
- I don’t know all the state capitals, but I can recite “Dumb and Dumber” word for word.
- Sometimes entire relationships can only be described as “that weird thing I did for a while.”
- I think self checkout was invented by a guy who had to buy tampons.
- One of the hardest things in life is having words in your heart that you cant say out loud.
- Marriage teaches you forgiveness, compromise and tons of other things you wouldn’t need if you’d stayed single.
- I only smoke because there’s a small chance it will kill everybody around me.
- Learn to spell. Auto Correct isn’t always write.
- That depressing moment when you pull up to work and the building is not engulfed in flames.
- I’ve decided to get rid of my bad habits…just as soon as equally satisfying good habits become available.
Yesterdays Status Updates… | Free Timeline Covers
Massive Tibetan Mastiff:
Jeez, wonder what sort of shampoo that guy uses! Better yet, what do you feed a dog that size?
Cat Waves at Himself:
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8CxYrv95FLM[/youtube]
Conufsed KittEhhhhh! Share if you thought that video was cute 🙂
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