T-Rex Illusion, Nutritious Joker, & Hilarious Statuses!

Welcome to 2014, make your friends laugh into the new year with these…

Hilarious Facebook Statuses:

  1. Seems like 2013 was just yesterday.
  2. Did you break your resolution already?
  3. If I hit snooze 3 times it should automatically send an email to my boss saying I’ll be out sick.
  4. Immature: A word boring people use to describe fun people.
  5. You never outgrow sleepovers, they just become coed.
  6. I hate to invite relatives over to the house because they are harder to get rid of than Adobe updates.
  7. How can I go to sleep when this movie I’ve seen 70 times just started?
  8. Call me crazy, but I really prefer the term mentally ill.
  9. Keeping a can of gray spray paint in your car is a lot cheaper than a ticket for parking in the red zone.
  10. Telling somebody you love them is like telling them your dream from last night. You can explain all you want. They’ll never understand.
  11. Some people are just beautifully wrapped boxes of crap.
  12. I realize that I’m obviously not learning from my mistakes….I still get up every morning and go to work.
  13. If I have offended you, hurt you, belittled you in any manner, then I want you to know that I was only just getting started.
  14. Always keep a note in your medicine cabinet that says, “I thought you were peeing?”
  15. Hard to believe I once had a phone ATTACHED TO A WALL. When it rang I’d pick it up WITHOUT KNOWING WHO WAS CALLING. It’s amazing I’m still alive.
  16. My new voicemail: “If you have reached this recording, please hang up and text me.”
  17. Remember: Single doesn’t always mean available and taken doesn’t always mean in love.
  18. Dear sneeze, If you’re gonna happen, happen. Don’t put a stupid look on my face and leave.
  19. Ever had one of those days where everything goes according to plan and turns out great……yeah me neither.
  20. Instead of telling my son that I walked to school uphill both ways in the snow with no shoes. I think I will have to tell him that I once had to use a dial up modem to connect to the internet, sometimes have to wait for a connection if I got a busy signal, if I was able to connect, I would have to listen to an awful noise, and once connected, pray no one in the house picked up the phone or else the connection would be lost. Kids today, they don’t know the hardships of yesteryear.

Yesterdays Status Updates…

Nutritious Joker…

Nutritious Joker

The ultimate joker 😉

T-Rex Illusion Video:


Whoa, that just blew my mind!

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