Sour Candy, Getting Tucked In, and Hilarious Status Posts

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Hilarious Statuses for Facebook:

  • I’m not shy, I’m just really good at figuring out who’s worth talking to.  ( 100K+ Statuses: Funny Status 2  5★ Ratings)
  • I don’t always bite the inside of my mouth, but when I do, I bite the exact same spot 10 more times throughout the day.
  • Love is just something our parents made up so we could get married and get the hell out of their house.
  • I say ” I shouldn’t be telling you this,” at the beginning of every conversation so people will listen to what I’m saying.
  • Disney Channel should just stop making new shows and replay all the old ones.
  • That awkward moment when your sarcasm is so advanced people actually think you are stupid.
  • Everyone has that friend with a nickname and when someone calls them by their real name it sounds weird. (Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page )
  • I think falling in/being in/falling out of love has been pretty well documented. Why aren’t there more songs about being hungry?
  • If you’re going to get a neck tattoo, get one that says, “Team player with great communication skills.”
  • Let’s give thanks we live in a country where political disagreements are expressed with poorly spelled Facebook posts instead of missiles.
  • When someone texts you “hahahahaha!!” instead of “haha” or “lol”, you know you’ve done well.
  • The sinking of the Titanic must have been a miracle to the lobsters in the kitchen.
  • If your mother cant find it, then it’s gone forever.
  • To all the students who drop out and failed high school: Remember two things, 1. You tried your best. 2. I don’t like onions on my Big Mac.
  • Putting your leg out of the blankets and then feeling exposed to monsters. (Twitter: @FreeFunnyStuff )
  • 8 year olds today have: Facebook, twitter, iPhones, and IPods.. When I was 8, I had a coloring book, crayons, and an imagination..

Puppy loves to get tucked in:

Puppy Gets Tucked In.

 

3 Year Old Eats Atomic Warhead Sour Candy…

His face says it all…  priceless! Sometimes you need to learn lessons the hard way, and that was one of them 🙂 Pass along this priceless lesson to your Facebook friends so they can share in the comedy.

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