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Facebook Status Updates about Life:
- Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral or fattening. (From our Funny Status Updates iPhone App ★★★★★)
- Every room I’m in is a panic room.
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I’m not 40-something. I’m $39.95, plus shipping and handling.
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The second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day, you’re off of it.
- How can you give your word and also keep it?
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Remember when using “protection” meant wearing your helmet?
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The average power nap is 20 minutes. This works out well because I can fit 3 of them evenly into one hour. (Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page)
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If I ever had to run for my life, I would probably die.
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Tomorrow will be canceled due to lack of interest.
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The biggest mistake I have made in my life is letting people stay in my life far longer than they deserve…
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Dear internet, Please stop being so awesome. Sincerely, I need to sleep.
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Don’t you just love it when you flip your pillow over and its cool on the other side 🙂
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I wish there were a way to find hot singles in my area.
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Who stopped payment on my reality check? (From our Twitter:@FreeFunnyStuff)
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Little known fact… NASA put a man on the moon with less computer memory than you use when taking a picture on your iPhone.
Thousands More Funny Status Updates…
I’m bored, wanna do something???
Sleepy Cat is so SLEEPY:
[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uiz80CuDN8Y[/youtube]
LOL Post that on your Facebook wall for instant likes & comments!
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