Cute Wave, Weird Goats, and Great Facebook Status Posts

Score more likes, with these…

Great Status Posts for Facebook:

• I exercised once, but found I was allergic to it. My skin flushed and my heart raced. I got sweaty and short of breath. Very dangerous. ( 100K+ Statuses: Funny Status iPhone App  5★ Ratings)
• I’m surprised more people don’t Photoshop a cleaner house into the background of their pictures.
• Keep the change, ya filthy animal.
• Going to Wal-Mart always reminds me that I hit the genetic lottery.
• That awkward moment when someone gives you a compliment and you can’t think of one in return.
• I don’t think of it as eating grapes, I think of it as preventing future raisins. Some call me a hero.
• Pretending to be a functioning adult is exhausting.
• Remember reading books because of Pizza Hut? #90s
• Use your smile to change this world. Don’t let this world change your smile.
• A ghost could be humping you right now and you would never know.
• Why are all social networking sites blue? Because it’s the color of the sky and we never go out to see it.
• RIGHT NOW YOU HAVE: 3 fingers behind your phone, your pinky tucked under for support and your scrolling with your thumb! LIKE if I’m right!
• If there was an award for laziness, I’d probably send someone to pick it up for me.
• I keep forgetting – which Disney princess is it who solves all her own problems without trying to find a boyfriend?
• Some say the glass is half empty, some say the glass is half full, I say, are you going to drink that?
• Every good friend once was a stranger.
• Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.
• Men are like bank accounts, without a lot of money they don’t generate a lot of interest.
• Eighty percent of all people consider themselves to be above average.
• It’s a good thing not everyone has a smartphone. Someone has to honk when the light turns green.
• When I was a kid “The Server Is Down” meant your waiter was depressed.
• Eventually we’ll all just have one app on our phones that electrocutes you when you stop looking at it.

How’s about this for a CUTE Wave?

Hello’ ello’ there wittle guy! Aren’t you adorable! I bet you’d make millions of peoples days on the interwebs just by being shared, wouldn’t you???

Weird Goats, yes… Goats:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mqgGlgonEa4[/youtube]

That video was exactly as advertised… weird goats. Now, go forth and immediately share it on your wall for many LIKES and funny comments.