Funny Statuses, Adorable Giraffe, and A Very Guilty Dog

Score more likes this weekend, share these…

Funny Status Updates for Facebook:

  • That awkward moment when you realize that every house has a particular smell, but you can’t smell the one at your house. ( 100K+ Statuses: Funny Status iPhone App  5★ Ratings)
  • Finding a needle in a haystack is quite easy if you just set the hay on fire.
  • Aren’t we all supposed to die next month or is that cancelled?
  • When someone spends five minutes reassuring you they won’t get emotionally attached to you: Abort Mission.
  • I always wanted to be a procrastinator… I just never got around to it.
  • If you’re behind someone at an ATM late night, let them know you’re not a threat by giving them a gentle kiss on their neck.
  • I hate it when people are at your house and ask “Do you have a bathroom?” No, we poop in the yard.
  • I like to ask the waiter, “What do you recommend?” then stare him down while I order something completely different.
  • Monday 🙁 Tuesday :/ Wednesday 😐 Thursday 🙂 Friday 😀 Saturday ^.^ Sunday -_-
  • I’m not lazy, I prefer the term ” selective participation” 🙂
  • I love everybody. Some I love to be around, some I love to avoid, and others I love to punch in the face.
  • I’d call you a tool, but even they serve a purpose.
  • New Rule: If I hold the door open for you and you walk by without thanking me I am guaranteed at least one attempt at trying to trip you.
  • I refuse to take a single bite of my food until I find something good on TV.

Giraffe’s Need Love Too..

Giraffe Love

Share this adorable fella on your Facebook if you like being liked 😉

Guilty Dog:

That may be an old viral video but, it’s still one of our favorites. Lets bring this one back for good times sake! Share on your Facebook news feed for instant likes, comments, and karma!

Tons more status updates, funny pictures, and viral videos… Just, “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App. Try our awesome FREE Facebook App  for 100k+ Facebook statuses to choose from. We’ll be back on Monday, have an awesome and safe weekend!