Funny Status

Woohoo, it’s freakin’ Tuesday. You know what that means right?!?!?!   More awesome funny hilarious facebook status updates for you! Funny Facebook Status Updates: If you go parachuting, and your parachute doesn’t open, and you friends are all watching you fall, I think a funny gag would be to pretend you were swimming. I won’t rise […]

Happy Monday, you inglorious bastard.  If you haven’t seen ZombieLand yet.  Do it.  You won’t regret it. Here are your bloody funny facebook status updates: I’m a Loner Dottie, A rebel. Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now. If you ever fall off the Sears Tower, just go real limp, because maybe […]

Ya, ya, we know.  You need your facebook status updates.  Here they are: Sleep is addicting. No buts meow.  That’s the law.  It’s not so funny meow, is it? Artificial Intelligence usually beats real stupidity. I’m thinking of a number… If you’re a young Mafia gangster out on your first date, I bet it’s real […]

Sup peeps.  Or should I say TWEEPS?  I just wanted to let ya’ll know that I loveeeee you.  Thanks for your support of the number one funny facebook status website on the interwebs.  Here’s your junk: Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math. I don’t know why Wall St. uses bulls and […]

Tuesday is my favorite day of the week… ya know why???  Because Tues comes from the latin word for Sleep-In.  Therefore today is Sleep-In day.  Not really.. but you could imagine what it would be like if it was! HA!  Sorry about that… anyways here are your dirty funny facebook status updates: If you ever […]