20 Funny Statuses: Post one of theses as your status and have all of your friends laughing along! I could defuse a bomb if it sounded like an alarm clock and I was sleeping. Always keep a bottle of wine in the fridge for special occasions. You know…like Thursday. Sometimes I don’t even know […]
Facebook Status Updates
Coke Cans, Puppy Video, and 20 Hilarious Status Updates
Put a smile on someones face! Share one of these statuses and make someones day. 20 Hilarious Status Updates: Some days you can’t play the music loud enough. I like to spend my Sunday night wishing it wasn’t Sunday night. Dropped some rice in water so I put it in a bag of cellphones […]
How to Hold a Baby, Act Natural, & 20 Hilarious Status Posts
Make someones week, share one of these.. 20 Hilarious Facebook Status Posts: Interviewer: Where do you see yourself in 5 years? Me: Probably still mirrors. If you don’t want people asking for rides again, say yes the first time but don’t show up. I have a conflict of no interest. My life is currently buffering. […]
Fish Plays Fetch, Misspelling Name, & 20 Great Facebook Status Ideas
Have a great weekend, make it last longer share one of these… 20 Great Facebook Statuses: Sometimes it takes me a full 8 hours to get nothing done. The most tragic victims of irony are the trees cut down to make copies of The Lorax. Waldo’s mom must be worried sick. Isn’t it weird that we […]
Don’t Wake Kitty, Awkward Driving Situation, & 20 Ridiculous Statuses
Make someones day, share one of these… 20 Ridiculous Facebook Statuses: Some people pass through our lives just to teach us not to be like them. A good way to mess with a jogger is to run up alongside him and say, “It’s okay, I think we lost him.” Words I’m incorporating into my vernacular: […]
Epic Slam Dunk, 500 Million Dollars, & 20 Status Updates for the Weekend
Make your weekend last longer, share one of these… Top 20 Weekend Status Updates: Favorite part of the day? The food part. I procrastinate so much I’ll probably put off death and never die. McDonald’s should do an Adult Happy Meal that’s just wine and cookies. Never look at your beer as half-empty. Look at […]