Score more likes, share these…
20 Fun Facebook Status Updates
- Why does nobody want to hire a “learns as I go” software engineer? I’m good, or at least I will be, I promise
- All you need is love… and a dog.
- I don’t have a bucket list, but my fucket list is a mile long.
- I’m not popular, but I have nice friends. I’m not rich but I have what I need. I may not be liked but I know I’m loved.
- One old song. A thousand old memories.
- English = Hello. Spanish = Hola. French = Bonjour. Japanese = Konnichiwa. Chinese = Nî Hâo. Italian = Ciao. Me = Sup B*tches.
- When I get married, divorce is not an option. You’re mad? Take your ass in the other room , calm down, because we’re going to work this out.
- All I’m saying is that Miley Cyrus was on the Disney Channel and had her clothes on when Bush was president. Thanks, Obama.
- The higher pitched my “hey!” the greater the chance I don’t remember who you are.
- That awkward moment when you don’t understand the feeling that you’re feeling.
- When a girl says: “I’m cold.” don’t be stupid and say “me too.
- It takes about 2.9 seconds for me to go from “this is the best day ever” to “I want to punch every person on planet Earth.”
- I never quite know exactly what I’m talking about.
- Hey websites, I will always “skip intro”, so knock it off.
- I admit you’re funny on facebook…. But I will never talk to you in real life. EVER!
- Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame that they’ll never meet…
- You unfollow me because you’re afraid of falling in love with me, I know.
- My phone is always there for me and likes to cuddle.
- The world is at peace when you’re eating a burrito.
- I’m wearing that smile you gave me.
Haha, that is classic! Those two look like they were made for that shot.
Exactly how I picture an Otter sounding 🙂