Perfect Match, Duck Chase, & Status Update Ideas

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20 Facebook Status Update Ideas:

  1. That awkward moment when you get a mini heart attack because you can’t feel your phone in your pocket.
  2. Sometimes I ask myself why do I stay up so late? Then I tell myself it’s none of my damn business.
  3. Step aside coffee. This is a job for alcohol.
  4. Don’t you love that moment when you’re cutting wrapping paper and the scissors start to glide?
  5. I already want to take a nap tomorrow.
  6. That was funny. But I don’t like you. Therefore I shall not laugh.
  7. If I don’t get enough sleep, I’m tired. If I get too much, I’m tired. And even if I get the right amount, I still need three pots of coffee.
  8. Never laugh at your significant others choices. You’re one of them.
  9. I hate it when I tell someone I’ll be there in 10 minutes, but they continue to call me every half-hour anyway.
  10. Have patience when dating. Sometimes you have to slay some dragons before you get a prince or princess.
  11. I should run for political office just to see what kind of scandalous dirt they dig up. It would be nice to piece together my twenties.
  12. A society should do whatever it takes to protect its children. End of story.
  13. Egg nog: Because milk isn’t gross enough.
  14. “Your face uses more muscles to frown than to smile.” What can I say, I’m addicted to fitness.
  15. The strongest drug that exists for a human is another human being.
  16. There you are, feeling pretty good about yourself. Then you hear a recording of yourself talk.
  17. “Nothing is impossible.” I disagree. I’m doing nothing right now… it’s totally possible.
  18. Remember these two words. They will open up the doors in your life. Push & Pull
  19. I wonder if I’m that friend everybody secretly hates.
  20. “It’s a long story” is just a polite way of saying “I don’ feel like telling you.”
  21. Lebron better than Jordan? Ha! Yea right. Holla at me when Lebron saves the Looney Toons from an alien race.

Yesterdays Status Updates… | Holiday Themed Timeline Covers

A Perfect Match:

Found a Match

Rofl! That is so amazingly awesome, what a cool Grandma 🙂

EPIC Duck Chase:

Dawwwwww how cute! Share to brighten someones day on FB, and you’ll be surprised at how many likes and cool comments you get.

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