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20 Facebook Status Update Ideas:
- That awkward moment when you get a mini heart attack because you can’t feel your phone in your pocket.
- Sometimes I ask myself why do I stay up so late? Then I tell myself it’s none of my damn business.
- Step aside coffee. This is a job for alcohol.
- Don’t you love that moment when you’re cutting wrapping paper and the scissors start to glide?
- I already want to take a nap tomorrow.
- That was funny. But I don’t like you. Therefore I shall not laugh.
- If I don’t get enough sleep, I’m tired. If I get too much, I’m tired. And even if I get the right amount, I still need three pots of coffee.
- Never laugh at your significant others choices. You’re one of them.
- I hate it when I tell someone I’ll be there in 10 minutes, but they continue to call me every half-hour anyway.
- Have patience when dating. Sometimes you have to slay some dragons before you get a prince or princess.
- I should run for political office just to see what kind of scandalous dirt they dig up. It would be nice to piece together my twenties.
- A society should do whatever it takes to protect its children. End of story.
- Egg nog: Because milk isn’t gross enough.
- “Your face uses more muscles to frown than to smile.” What can I say, I’m addicted to fitness.
- The strongest drug that exists for a human is another human being.
- There you are, feeling pretty good about yourself. Then you hear a recording of yourself talk.
- “Nothing is impossible.” I disagree. I’m doing nothing right now… it’s totally possible.
- Remember these two words. They will open up the doors in your life. Push & Pull
- I wonder if I’m that friend everybody secretly hates.
- “It’s a long story” is just a polite way of saying “I don’ feel like telling you.”
- Lebron better than Jordan? Ha! Yea right. Holla at me when Lebron saves the Looney Toons from an alien race.
A Perfect Match:
Rofl! That is so amazingly awesome, what a cool Grandma 🙂
EPIC Duck Chase:
Dawwwwww how cute! Share to brighten someones day on FB, and you’ll be surprised at how many likes and cool comments you get.