Step your status game up, share these…
Seriously Funny Statuses:
- I’m not anti-social I’m just pro leave me the heck alone.
- Well, the people outside are frightful.
- The happiness of your life…depends on the quality of your thoughts.
- Oh, you can’t sleep? Why not tell everyone on Facebook? That’ll help.
- I’m not crazy, my reality is just prettier than yours.
- After reading your recent updates, I’m surprised that Facebook hasn’t yet asked you, “Whatever’s on your mind, could you keep it to yourself?”
- If you have a problem with me please write it nicely on a piece of paper, put it in an envelope, fold it and shove it up your ass.
- Attention all crackheads, it is a very bad time to ask me if I have any “spare change” when I’m pumping 4 dollar a gallon gas into my car.
- I only say “bless you” twice. If you sneeze a third time I assume you cant be blessed and you’re a demon who must be destroyed.
- Oh, you’re dating my ex? Cool, I’m eating a sandwich. Want those leftovers too?
- To all the people who failed out of high school, just remember 2 things: 1) At least you tried your best, and 2) I said NO tomatoes on my burger!
- I like a song. I download it. I listen to it a million times and then I hate it.
- This morning when I awoke I rolled over, smiled at the beauty that was there beside me , gazed into those beautiful brown eyes and said, “Good Morning Sexy.” I knew it was a good idea to install that mirror by the bed.
- When I want your opinion, I’ll give it a funny voice.
- Underachieving Sunday through Wednesday, overachieving Thursday through Saturday.
- Insomnia, the universe’s way of making sure your never too old to watch looney tunes at 5am. well played universe.
- The closest that I’ve gotten to murder: Holding Oreos under the milk until the bubbles stop…
- If we are walking towards each other on the sidewalk, do not try to intimidate me. I VEER FOR NO ONE.
- After a night of heavy drinkin’ there’s one thing I can’t stand… and that’s up.
- What is it like to not be tired? …I can’t remember.
Husky Learns to Howl with His Human:
Dawwww, that’s adorable! Share if you enjoyed 🙂