Good Morning Pugs, Understanding, and Top Rated Facebook Status Updates

Make your weekend last longer, share one of these…

Top Rated Facebook Status Updates this week:

  1. Sad how some stick figures get stuck working the hangman game, while others get to have nice families on the back of SUVs.
  2. Laughing at your own texts before you send them because you’re so damn funny.
  3. So many concerts, not enough money.
  4. Can I apologize in advance for basically everything I will ever do???
  5. There’s no such thing as too old for Disney.
  6. “I’m so glad I live in a world where there are Octobers.”
  7. They say you can tell how someone has sex by how they dance…. So ladies be prepared for a lot of counting and clapping.
  8. You could completely eliminate the semicolon key and 90% of America wouldn’t notice… until they needed to wink at somebody.
  9. CEO: “Ugh this cereal is disappointing and makes me wanna cry. What should we call it?”
    Phil: “Life?”
  10. You will never be happier than a girl who just discovered her dress has pockets.
  11. Watching a guy put on chapstick is like staring into the sun.
  12. Can anyone recommend a good movie to kinda listen to while I stare at my phone?
  13. I don’t understand why Walmart has a problem with me bringing my dog in the store. He’s better behaved, smells better, and less likely to take a crap on the floor than 95% of the people here.
  14. The LIKE button: also for choosing sides in a Facebook argument without saying anything.
  15. This is how my week goes: Mooooonnnnnddaaaaaaaaay Tueeeesssdaaaaaaayyyyy Weeedddnnnesssdayyyyy Thursssssdaaaaaaaayyyyy FridaySaturdaySunday.
  16. Why I wear thick, fluffy socks: 1% Comfort 1% Warmth 98% Increased ability to slide across floor like a fricken ninja on an invisible surfboard.
  17. Something Video Games teach us: ” If you meet your enemies, it means that you are going in the right direction. Don’t back down now!”
  18. Smile like you’ve never cried, fight like you’ve never lost, love like you’ve never been hurt, and live like you’ll die tomorrow.
  19. My head says “go to the gym” but my heart says, “stay on the internet forever and eat!”
  20. I would explain it to you again, but I am fresh out of puppets and crayons.

Witty Status | Yesterdays Status Updates…

Good Morning Pugs:

That’s what we call pure love. I wish I could wake to that every morning.

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