We’ve got the cure for your Tuesday! Post these on your Facebook Profile…
Funny Status Updates for Facebook:
- Materialism: buying things we don’t need with money we don’t have to impress people that don’t matter. (Courtesy of our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone/iPod App)
- Who was the first to see a cow and think “I wonder what will happen if I squeeze these dangly things and drink whatever comes out?”
- Did you ever notice that there are more horses’ asses in the world than there are horses.
- When I’m texting someone, I feel like compelled to match that person’s patterns of capitalization and punctuation.
- “God I wish I was riding a dinosaur right now.” – My brain, circa now.
- Tip: Always say the stain on your shirt is from today.
- Think I might run a marathon just to prove to myself that I can do something pointless and awful.
- I think that limiting the nuggeting of animals to only chicken was a mistake.
- The good old days were when inflation was something you did to a balloon.
- Women are angels, and when someone breaks their wings, they continue to fly…on a broomstick. They’re flexible that way. ツ (Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page)
- Let’s organize this thing and take all the fun out of it.
- Some people say I’m a dreamer, others say, “If you fall asleep at work again we’re going to have to let you go.
- A nice way to fire someone is to throw them a surprise going away party.
- You’re never too old to learn something stupid. (VIA our Twitter:@FreeFunnyStuff )
- If you can’t be part of the solution, insist on being most of the problem.
“SERIOUS” Status: You can easily judge the character of a man by how he treats those who can do nothing for him.
Funny Picture to Post:
Big Bed Small Puppy Small Bed Big Doggie.
Funny Video to Post:
What’s better than one cute baby? Two cute babies! That’s a great video to post to your Facebook wall!
If you still need more funny status updates, pics, and videos to post: “Like” our FB Fan Page &Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App and visit our new sister website WittyStatus where you can submit statuses and vote on them!