Make The Social Network better, share these…
Clever Facebook Status Updates:
- That awkward moment when you’re trying to dodge someone, and you both step the same way… twice.
- I wish my computer would stop asking me stupid questions. Of course I’m sure I want to clear my browser history.
- The thing that sucks about hanging out with my friends is that they see how much I stare at my phone and know how little I answer their texts.
- My life is that 2:30 feeling.
- If the cup is only half full, I suggest buying a smaller bra.
- The only thing I ever win playing McDonald’s Monopoly is 10 pounds.
- They say that spontaneity is the spice of life but I don’t see it on the shelf…. so I’m going with Paprika.
- Ironic how when someone tells you to get real it’s typically because you were exactly that with them.
- Why doesn’t Facebook notify you when someone unfriends you?
- If it was the other way around, I doubt one cat would take in 23 old ladies.
- You offer someone a sincere compliment on their mustache and suddenly she’s not your friend anymore.
- Instead of “lol” try “lsimhbiwfefmtalol”. Laughing silently in my head because it wasn’t funny enough for me to actually laugh out loud.
- That was insensitive… I asked you to stop being stupid without considering how incredibly difficult that must be for you.
- Doctors write the prescriptions illegibly so you can’t see that it says: “This one had insurance. Don’t kill him.”
- “Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.” -Steve Jobs
- If you don’t cuss when you drive you aren’t paying enough attention to the road.
- I think I like mornings best when they start in the afternoon.
- I never use the phrase, “Your guess is as good as mine” because, well… it’s not.
- Alarm clocks. Because every morning should begin with a mini heart attack.
- Fact: Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Free Hugs taken to the next level:
Capitalism never ceases to amaze me. Wonder what the Deluxe bonus gets you? Ask your Facebook friends if they’d pay for the upgrade!
That’s what they call a “MOMENT” captured perfectly for all of YouTube history to come 🙂 Share this beloved dancing moment with the rest of your Facebook crowd to brighten someones day!