Get through Wednesday, share these…
Hump Day Facebook Status Updates:
- Wednesday, I know you’re not Monday, but you still kinda suck.
- The best way to hang up on someone is to do it in the middle of your own sentence, that way they will just think you lost service.
- If you always do what you have always done, then you will get what you have always got.
- I email you because you make social interaction awkward.
- Hiring electricians without eyebrows generally isn’t a good idea.
- I’m not saying your opinion is stupid. I’m just saying you’re stupid for having it.
- I need to find a way to be asleep but still get all my work done.
- If State Farm were such a good neighbor they’d come over and pick up all the dog crap in my yard.
- Reminiscing isn’t as fun as it used to be.
- Is there a “very single” option on Facebook?
- If you make me get up from this chair and your not on fire, you will be!
- I try to live everyday as if it were my last. Who wants to do laundry on the last day they’re alive?
- If you don’t have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over?
- Internet dating: the odds are good but the goods are odd.
- “In an unhealthy relationship” should definitely be a Facebook option.
- Unless life hands you water and sugar, your lemonade is gonna suck.
- Time goes by way too fast when you’re sleeping.
- I propose we add a new day to the week and call it “Someday,” just think of all the awesome stuff that would happen on it.
- When people introduce themselves to me for the first time, I tell them, “Yes, we’ve met before.” So they feel awkward trying to remember me.
- You’re only as cool as your nickname.
Big Ass Dog is HUGE:
Whoa! That is one huge puppy. He’s like 3x as big as the owner. Imagine seeing that beast in person. [via imgur]
How To Get a Dolphins Attention Using a Comb:
How strangely cute. That adorable Dolphin was cracking up like “really, human? you thought a comb would get our attention?”