Baby Elephant Slips, Koala Bear, and 20 Laughable Facebook Status Updates

Happy Friday, you made it! Share one of these…

20 Laughable Facebook Status Updates:

  1. It’s fall, which means my TV game is on point and my social game is at an all time fail level.
  2. I embarrass myself in front of myself.
  3. Sorry for calling you a bitch. Thought you already knew…
  4. There is no evidence that exists that life should be taken seriously.
  5. I carry a knife, but it’s just in case of cake.
  6. Take those tears, dry them out to make salt, and have yourself a margarita.
  7. Single people: “Wanna get crazy and handcuff me tonight?”
    Married people: “Wanna get crazy and add bacon to the sandwiches tonight?”
  8. Music is a good place to hide.
  9. But, what if my favorite thing to do is nothing….?
  10. For every action, there’s an equal and opposite reaction. Plus a social media overreaction.
  11. You can either wear granny panties OR yoga pants – not both. Pick one.
  12. 10 million people share the same birthday as you. Your personalized horoscope means shit.
  13. With the right music, you either forget everything or you remember everything.
  14. One of the saddest days of my life was when I heard that bears sleep for half the year and I realized I had been born the wrong species.
  15. If you emphasize the ‘po’ in police they’re probably already after you.
  16. Instead of knowing what the #1 song was when you were born it would be cool if it could tell you what the #1 song will be when you die. That way when you start hearing it on the radio, you’ll know that the end is near.
  17. I have 2 missed calls from my mother. I think it’s safe to say that by now there’s a rescue team out there looking for me.
  18. The only way to communicate with a drunk person is to get hammered too.
  19. Don’t you hate it when spiders bite you and you get like zero superpowers?
  20. If you say “Raise Up Lights” you just said “Razor Blades” in an Austrailian accent.

Witty Status | Yesterdays Status Updates…

Baby Elephant Slips, Watch for Moms Reaction:


That’s so fricken’ adorable! Elephants are so smart. What a great family 🙂 Share if you enjoyed!

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