Almost Christmas! Yay 🙂 Until then, make someone smile and share one of these…
20 Clever Facebook Status Updates:
- Best pickup line : wanna get pizza?
- I’m 500% done with today and about 36% done with tomorrow.
- Sorry Folgers, but the best part about waking up is going back to bed after you pee.
- “don’t be sad”
Thanks you cured me.
- That awkward moment when everyone else understands it except you, but you act like you did, because you’ll just Google it later.
- I like how automatic doors just get out of my way. I wish more inanimate objects seemed scared of me.
- You know nothing of struggle until your headphones only work when you hold the wire in a certain position.
- I’d leave my house more often if it wasn’t for people. Just, like, all of them.
- Sometimes I get in this weird mood where I find everyone annoying. But it only happens when I’m awake.
- If a woman tells you that you’re right, that’s called sarcasm.
- Over the river and through the woods… Yep. When you’re driving on icy roads, you can end up pretty much anywhere.
- A careful driver is one who just saw the car ahead of him get a traffic ticket.
- One day you’re the best thing since sliced bread. The next, you’re toast.
- My one regret in life will be that I didn’t spend enough time staring at my phone.
- Everyone has a soft side. I spend too much time sitting on mine.
- Well well well, if it isn’t the problems I keep running from.
- I look best with the filters called “lights off” and “darkness”
- Women- God’s version of Rubik cube.
- Trust me, no one’s spreading rumors about you. We’re too busy talking about ourselves here.
- I meant to make you a rum cake but somehow I made you a plain cake and now I’m drunk.
Best Doctor in the World:
That baby had a great visit to the doctor 🙂 I wish all doctor visits could be like this! Please feel free to like or share if you enjoyed.