More likes per status, share these… Brilliantly Funny Status Updates: My car doubles in value when I fill my gas tank up. I don’t understand banks. Why do they attach chains to their pens? If I am trusting you with my money, you should trust me with your pens. Please create a password. Your password […]
Facebook Status Updates
Phone Returned, Jamming, & Best Status Updates
Score more likes, share these… 20 of the Best Status Updates for Facebook: 99% of relationships involve tolerating how weird the other person is. Never sit down in front of the computer while having breakfast because when you get up it’ll be dinner time. I realize most old people have to watch their budget, but […]
Icy Bridge, Pancakes, and Great Status Posts
Score more likes, share these… 20 Great Status Updates: “Are you as bored as I am?” Read that backwards, and it still makes sense. I’m convinced that leaning forward while playing video games substantially improves my overall performance. During the stone age, long before Facebook, man was already experiencing the irrepressible need to express on […]
Headshot, Treadmill Cats, and Top Facebook Statuses
The best statuses this week… Top Facebook Status Updates: My life has become a never ending game of ‘illegal or just frowned upon? The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us. My advice for pretty much anything that’s broken is “did you […]
Cat Dog, Fancy Pup, and Quality Status Updates
Get the likes you deserve, share these… Quality Facebook Statuses x 20: Absolutely no one can text faster than a pissed off woman. I can’t believe that I wanted to grow up. Some people need to open their small minds instead of their big mouths. You know that tingly little feeling you get when you […]
Dancing Time, Free Hugs, & Clever Status Updates
Make The Social Network better, share these… Clever Facebook Status Updates: That awkward moment when you’re trying to dodge someone, and you both step the same way… twice. I wish my computer would stop asking me stupid questions. Of course I’m sure I want to clear my browser history. The thing that sucks about hanging […]