Phone Returned, Jamming, & Best Status Updates

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20 of the Best Status Updates for Facebook:

  1. 99% of relationships involve tolerating how weird the other person is.
  2. Never sit down in front of the computer while having breakfast because when you get up it’ll be dinner time.
  3. I realize most old people have to watch their budget, but can someone please tell them that nose hair trimmers are well worth the investment.
  4. There’s always some truth behind: Just kidding, Knowledge behind: I don’t know, Emotion behind: I don’t care & Pain behind: It’s okay.
  5. Still hoping that one day I get to ride a kayak while it’s strapped to the top of someone’s car.
  6. TRAVEL TIP: When you are alone in a hotel room with two beds, that means one bed is for eating on and one bed is for sleeping on.
  7. I think there’s finally enough stuff in my kitchen junk drawer to build a spaceship.
  8. Maybe tomorrow I’ll do that thing I said I’d do yesterday.
  9. I can keep a secret… It’s all the other people I tell it to who can’t.
  10. A good day for a bad boy is talking a good girl into a bad decision.
  11. Phones are smart. Cars are smart. Even water. is smart. Humans, not so smart.
  12. There are two types of people who really irritate me: 1. A drunk person when I’m sober. 2. A sober person when I’m drunk.
  13. “Do you want my honest opinion?” = “I’m about to upset you.”
  14. If only women knew that being happy with themselves is the most attractive quality they can ever offer.
  15. May your life be as awesome as you pretend it is on Facebook.
  16. I don’t mean to alarm you but you know those people in your office that can’t work the fax machine? They’re driving home on the same roads.
  17. The biggest lie I tell myself is “I don’t need to write that down, I’ll remember it.”
  18. I really hope the guy from Microsoft can take some time out from his busy schedule to read the hundreds of error reports I send him daily.
  19. Like this if you can’t think of a clever status either…
  20. Sometimes the smartest thing you can do is play dumb.

Yesterdays Status Updates… | Free Timeline Covers

Epic Jam Sesh:

Epic Jam Sesh

Ah-dor-able! Plus, the Doggie-guitar and Little Tykes Kazo-board go amazingly well together. It’s a match made in heaven.

Phone is lost during X-Games and is Returned to Owner in an AWESOME fashion:


All lost phones should return to their owners like that… the world would be a better place if your lost phone chased you down and found you 🙂

Lots more status updates, funny pictures, and videos… On our Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App.