Pick one that fits you, and share it… Great Status Ideas for Facebook: Being fat = Lowers your chance of getting kidnapped. (JUST Updated iPhone App: Funny Status ★★★★★ ) LIKE if you watch your garage door close completely just in case a murderer rolls under at the last second. I never argue, I just explain why I’m […]
Top 15 Status Updates, Otter Down, and a Confused Kitty.
Pick a status that fits you, and share it… Top 15 Status Updates this Week: Of course I talk to myself. I need to have an intelligent conversation every now and then. (Top-Rated iPhone App: Funny Status ★★★★★ ) Live for what tomorrow has to offer, not what yesterday has taken away. People who matter don’t judge, & […]
Nice People, Ceiling Fan Settings, and Great Facebook Posts
Make your friends laugh, share these… Great Facebook Status Posts: If you hurt my best friend, I will make your death look like an accident. (Top-Rated iPhone App: Funny Status ★★★★★ ) Does liking a sad status update mean I’m sympathetic for them or I like that they are sad? When did everyone start using Facebook status updates […]
Just Chillin’ Dog, Bert & Ernie Raps, and Cool Statuses
More likes per share, with these… Status Updates that Rock: Facebook Activity Feed: Somebody you don’t care for just listened to a song you hate on Spotify! (JUST Updated iPhone App: Funny Status ★★★★★ ) Me? Sarcastic? Never. Hiding an annoying friend’s Facebook status updates is the new encasing somebody in Carbonite. Updates status.. no one comments. Updates […]
Velociraptor Terror, Creative Facebook Statuses, and Shark Watermelon
Get more likes, per status… Creative Status Ideas: If you think someone is staring at you: A. Yawn B. If they yawn, they were staring. (Top-Rated iPhone App: Funny Status ★★★★★ ) Dear eyelashes, wish bones, dandelions, pennies in fountains, shooting stars, 11:11, and birthday candles. YOU FAILED. Admit it, you have that one voice that you only […]
Parkour Dog, Angry Birds, & Great Status Posts
Make your newsfeed exciting, with these… Great Status Updates for Facebook: That awkward moment when you’re talking and your gum falls out of your mouth. ( Funny Status iPhone App ★★★★★ – *JUST UPDATED* ) A wise man learns from his mistakes. A wiser man learns from others’ mistakes. You’re driving a car. It isn’t a telephone booth, a […]