Happy New Years! Here’s to 2014 🙂 New Years Eve Status Updates: Here is your New Years Resolution. All of that stupid shit you did last year? Don’t do that crap this year. Done. You’re welcome. I’m so broke this New Years Im gonna party like its $19.99. I still think 1990 was 10 years […]
Curiosity, KitteH Enjoys Fire, and Clever Statuses
Score more likes, share these… Clever Statuses for Facebook: All I’m saying is, you’ve never seen me crying and eating tacos at the same time. We are all searching for someone whose demons play well with ours. Everyone you will ever meet knows something you don’t. 4/20? More like 1/5. Stupid stoners forgot to reduce […]
Human Beatbox, Nap Time, and Silly Statuses.
Make your weekend last longer, share these… Silly Facebook Statuses: You better not pout, you better not cry, you better not shout I’m telling you why…we have our own problems and nobody cares about yours. There is almost a full year until Christmas and people already have their Christmas lights up…. Unbelievable. Everybody has that […]
Big Kitty, Home Early, and Witty Statuses
Score more likes, share these… 20 Witty Facebook Statuses: Santa Clause has the right idea. Visit people once a year. Movies are so unrealistic. This guy’s using his computer to access an alien ship & not once has it asked if he wants to upgrade his Adobe… Don’t answer text messages right when I get […]
Christmas Status Update Spectacular 2013
Make your Christmas last longer, share these… Christmas Status Updates: Merry Christmas, ya filthy animals. On the 12th Day of Christmas my FACEBOOK gave to me…. 12 dudes I’m blocking, 11 friends just watching, 10 corny topics, 9 busted barbies, 8 friends complaining, 7 stalkers stalking, 6 party invites, Fiiiiiiiiiiiive Drama Queeeeeeeennnssss………4 game requests, 3 […]
Howling Lessons, Drunk Chicks, and Seriously Funny Statuses
Step your status game up, share these… Seriously Funny Statuses: I’m not anti-social I’m just pro leave me the heck alone. Well, the people outside are frightful. The happiness of your life…depends on the quality of your thoughts. Oh, you can’t sleep? Why not tell everyone on Facebook? That’ll help. I’m not crazy, my reality […]