Dolphin meets Cat, Save the Whales, & 20 Hilarious Statuses

Get over hump day, share one of these..

Didn’t Selfie Sticks used to be called Friends?
No need to dwell on your past mistakes. You’re going to make worse.
I’m sick of pretending to be pleasant.
I could use a puppy right about now.
Beauty fades but sarcasm is forever.
The best thing about being a narcissist must be not knowing you are a narcissistic.
My right thumb is in the best shape of my life.
I just looked directly at my phone and thought “where’s my phone?” So I probably qualify for Mensa.
If I were a bird, I already know who I’d poop on.
My bank account is more like a countdown to homelessness.
Rap is all about poor people bragging about being rich, while country is rich people bragging about being poor.
*wants to travel the world but has like 3 dollars*
If I ever lose my pinky finger, when children ask what happened I’m going to tell them that I broke a promise.
When Apple Watch OS 2 comes out, the phrase “My watch is slow” will forever change meaning.
“Don’t be shy!” ..
Thanks, you cured me
A wife is like a hand grenade. Remove the ring and your house is gone.
Who else has taken 2+ years of a foreign language and still has no clue how to speak it…
Keeping my mouth shut was my greatest accomplishment today.
Life is too short for fake butter, cheese or people.
Being tired is just part of my personality.

Save the Whales..

Lmao!

Dolphin Meets Cat..

Cat Boops. Dolphin carefully examines cat trying to find out why he’s such a jerk.

Lots more status updates, funny pictures, and video, on our Fan Page.