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- That awkward moment when you remember something funny & start smiling like an idiot, & everyone stares at you wondering why you’re smiling.
- Arguing in sign language must be a workout.
- When standing in line, I only hate the people in front of me. Everyone behind me is cool.
- Home is not where you live, but where they understand you.
- There is a special place in hell for people who are not ready to order when it’s their turn.
- I’m comfortable with you when: – I’m weird with you – I sing whatever song comes into my mind – I say what’s on my mind – I talk nonsense.
- School doesn’t even test your intelligence, it tests your memory.
- I love you with all my butt. I would say heart, but my butt’s bigger.
- Victoria’s Secret needs to be my bedroom. Starbucks needs to be my kitchen. Forever 21 needs to be my closet.
- Why would you try to avoid risks in life? To make it safely to death?
- In the morning there’s a huge difference between 6:00 and 6:05.
- I wish I had a cute laugh but instead I sound like a dying seal.
- If I could remember other things like I remember lyrics … I would be a genius.
- Life is weird. You can go from being strangers. To being friends. To being more than friends. To being pratically strangers again.
- Monday: No. Tuesday: Ugh. Wednesday: Why. Thursday: Omg. Friday: Finally. Saturday: Yes. Sunday: Crying.
- Don’t judge a book by its cover. My math textbook has a picture of someone enjoying themselves on it. I did not enjoy myself at all…
- I’m the type of person who looks at the menu for five minutes but ends up ordering the same exact thing every time.
- Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you were an expert on my life and how I should live it. Please continue while I take notes.
- My version of flirting is looking at someone I find attractive multiple times and hoping they are more brave than I am.
- It’s funny how fast you can wake up when you realize you’ve overslept.
Adorable Baby Sloth + Baby Giraffe Toy 🙂
Best pals enjoy a good hug!
This Pitbull, REALLY wants this stick…
Legend has it, that he’s still hanging on to this very day.