Dancing Cockatoo, Super Turtle, & Top Facebook Status Updates

Collected from this week on Facebook..

Top 20 Facebook Status Updates:

  1. I wish I could illegally download clothes.
  2. Why fall in love when you can fall asleep?
  3. Want to really creep somebody out? Go on facebook and like every single one of their photos.
  4. Some old people are driving vehicles right now and don’t even know it.
  5. Judge me if you will, just keep the verdict to yourself.
  6. If you give a girl your hoodie, don’t expect to get it back.
  7. Friends don’t let friends tYp3 LyK tHi5.
  8. me (surprised): omg. me (amused): omg. me (angry): omg. me (sad): omg. me (nostalgic): omg. me (annoyed): omg. me (scared): omg.
  9. Put on your seat belt… I wanna try something.
  10. Whenever I meet a new girl, I introduce myself by shaking hands with my left hand. I don’t want her to meet her competition right away
  11. Grudges are a waste of perfect happiness. Laugh when you can, apologize when you should, and let go of what you cannot change.
  12. Do you ever just look at really attractive people and sigh.
  13. Parents: Your room is a mess. Me: You should see my life.
  14. Do you ever just wake up and go “nope” and roll over and go back to sleep?
  15. Reasons to date me: I laugh at my own jokes so you don’t have to.
  16. Harlem shake is just an excuse to go full retard for 30 seconds.
  17. So can we just skip to summer now?
  18. If only stress burned calories.
  19. Politeness has become so rare that some people mistake it for flirtation.
  20. I wasn’t mad. Then you asked me 10 times if I was mad. Now I’m mad.

Yesterdays Status Updates… | Free Timeline Covers

Ladies & Gentlemen, Mr. Super Turtle:

Super Turtle

He’s no Ninja but, he’s darn cute! Super Turtle FTW.

Cockatoo dancing to Daft Punk:

That bird has got some rhythm! Share this post if you enjoyed the video!!

Tons more status updates, funny pictures, and videos… On our Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App. Check back on Monday for more funny status updates!