Score more likes, share these…
20 Laughable Facebook Statuses:
- I say ” I shouldn’t be telling you this,” at the beginning of every conversation so people will listen to what I’m saying.
- This is for all my people with no status today..keep your head up…stay strong.
- If I owned a copy store I would only hire identical twins.
- Is running in front of cars some sort of gang initiation for squirrels?
- Got my cat fixed today. Now it’s a dog.
- Insurance companies remind me of the mafia. They try to intimidate you into buying protection with statements like ” That’s a great family you have!…..It would be a shame if something HAPPENED to them.”
- Pirates that used X to mark the spot were stupid. If they had used a G, nobody would ever have found their treasure.
- Don’t be scared of making changes. Be scared of living the same shitty life because you didn’t change. And spiders. Be scared of them too.
- Lucky is the person who has the ability to see their own shortcomings. Miserable is the person who can only see the flaws of others.
- Write me your opinions on this extra soft paper and leave it next to my toilet.
- The best moves in life are made in silence. Don’t talk about it. Just do it and let them talk about it. Failure talks. Success walks.
- I’m awkward when people compliment me. “Nice hair” “Thanks, I grew it myself”
- I have been delaying my computer updates an hour for the past 3 years.
- Don’t bother looking up “impose.” It’s next to impossible.
- You know you’re desperate for an answer when you look on the second page of google.
- The next time you feel you’re worthless…. just remember…. your organs are worth a LOT of money on the black market.
- We’re expecting a baby, but we are hoping for a dragon.
- If you type “coughing” into Google images, it looks like a bunch of people giving bj’s to an invisible man.
- The more periods she writes after “ok…” the less okay things are.
- (._.) ( l: ) ( .-. ) ( :l ) (._.) ( l: ) ( .-. ) ( :l ) (._.) … Because…That’s how I roll…
Sometimes I feel the same way.
SlowMotion Parkour Doggie…
That was EPIC! You may share if you’d like.