Make someones day, share these…
21 Spectacular Status Updates:
- There is a huge difference between a hot girl and a girl wearing lesser clothes.
- If you pay entry fee to a marathon, they literally give you a run for your money.
- Sometimes my neighbors love my music so much that they invite the police to listen.
- Smiles can hide so much; fear, pain ,sadness, tears. But than again they reflect one thing; strength.
- The phrase, “Don’t take this the wrong way” has a zero percent success rate.
- Universal Fact: Your Girlfriend Misses You The Most When You’re Partying With Your Friends.
- New STD called, “feelings”.. Don’t catch that sh*t.
- Don’t dress like a hoe and expect a guy to approach you like a princess.
- I saw some footage of some polar bears drinking water today. It’s obviously fake. Everybody knows they only drink Coca-Cola.
- Treat me like a joke and I’ll leave you like it’s funny.
- My favorite outdoor activity is going back inside.
- Yo fellas how did that “wow” comment you left on that girls Facebook picture play out?
- If you trip and are about to fall on the ground yell “He’s got a gun!” and then you’ll look like a cool hero.
- Math Problem: A smalltown girl boards a train leaving South Detroit at midnight. If she doesn’t stop believing, how long is her Journey?
- Doing pretty good so far on my 1500 calorie a day diet as long as I don’t eat anything else today….. and tomorrow.
- I’m on a quest around the world to find Bigfoot. I’d originally set out to find cheap gas, but I decided to keep my goals realistic.
- You don’t look like 200 likes in person.
- People who laugh so hard at their own jokes that they cant even finish the joke because they’re laughing so hard are my favorite kind of people.
- Found a cigarette butt next to the mousetrap in my room. Like he sat there and thought about it.
- Fun game to play at the movies: not bringing your f*cking baby.
- I am sooo glad I was young, wild & crazy before there were cell phones & evidence.
The Unaired SNL Sketch: Nasim Pedrad As Aziz Ansari…
Dead on! She’s hilarious 🙂 what a great gal. Share if you enjoyed.