Perfect Statuses for your Weekend

Enjoy the weekend folks.  Make every second of it last by sharing some laughs with your Facebook friends by posting these…

Funny Status Updates for Facebook:

  • It’s not the fall that kills you; it’s the sudden stop at the end. (From our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone App)
  • I think I’ve finally perfected the art of silent criticism, though you wouldn’t know it.
  • It takes 250,001 Americans to screw in a lightbulb. 1 to do it..and 250,000 to debate if it was politically correct.
  • Whoever said the camera adds 10 pounds should stop eating cameras.
  • If you don’t care where you are, then you ain’t lost.
  • I’m not so much goofing off as impersonating upper management.
  • One of the most dreaded things to hear at the end of your work day is, “Oh good, you’re still here…”
  • If winning isn’t everything why do they keep score?
  • I’ve been eating healthier. By that I mean I’ve stopped cooking.
  • Hard work never hurt anybody. But I’m hoping the boss will be first.
  • If I was rich, I’d do nothing all day from a much nicer recliner. (From our Twitter Account: @FreeFunnyStuff )

It’s always darkest before dawn. So if you’re going to steal your neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it. ツ ( “Like” our Funny Status Update Fan Page for daily Funny Status Updates)

Funny Picture to Post:

Funny Video to Post:


A pie in the face will bring joy to anyone’s day… except for the person it happens to!  Have a good safe weekend and type your favorite statuses in the comments! If you still need more funny status updates, pics, and videos to post:  “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App