Flower Hat for Hamster, Crying Babies on Planes, and Funny Status Updates

Happy Monday! Make your FB Friends laugh by posting these hilarious…

Funny Status Updates for Facebook:

  • What’s on your mind u ask? Well, Facebook.. I would tell u but you’re terrible at keeping secrets! (Courtesy of our Funny Status Updates iPhone App ★★★★★)
  • The best way to combat criminals is by not voting for them.
  • Why be difficult? Put some effort in and be impossible.
  • It’s not the fall that kills you; it’s the sudden stop at the end.
  • A computer program will always do what you tell it to, and seldom what you want it to.
  • Marriage is a three-ring circus: Engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
  • It’s funny how I’m good at giving advice to others, but when it comes to helping myself, I don’t know what to do. ツ (Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page)
  • Sometimes I eat things just to avoid the temptation of eating them later.
  • When someone texts you “hahahahaha!!” instead of “haha” or “lol”, you know you’ve done well.
  • Just because you don`t believe me, doesn’t mean that I’m lying.
  • I don’t need a certain number of friends, just a number of friends I can be certain of.
  • That awkward moment when you’re in the grocery store and someone is standing in front of the item you need, so you pretend to look at something else until they move.
  • I’m not anti-social. I just don’t like you.
  • People in this office are weird. Not like me and my hundreds of imaginary internet friends. (VIA:@FreeFunnyStuff )
  • I hate when people watch me using the computer.
  • Deleting my feelings for you…….. ERROR! File too big!

Funny picture to Post:

Hamster wearing a flower for a hat.

How to make crying babies on a plane more tolerable:


LOL, that guys facial expressions are classic.

Want more funny status updates, hilarious pics, and epic videos?  “Like” our FB Fan PageDownload our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App and visit our new sister website WittyStatus where you can submit statuses and vote on them!