Tech News Gaff, Balance, & Status Updates about Life

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Top Facebook Status Updates about Life:

  1. This month has five Fridays, five Saturdays, and five Sundays but only FOUR Mondays. You’re welcome!
  2. That awkward moment when the weirdest person in your school gets a girlfriend/boyfriend, and you’re still forever alone.
  3. “Just because you’re offended, doesn’t mean you’re right.” -Ricky Gervais
  4. Don’t let idiots ruin your day.
  5. Wonder if anyone actually acts like a crazy racist nutjob to avoid jury duty.
  6. Don’t talk to me about bravery until you’re watching a horror film, alone in bed, with one leg out of the covers.
  7. Here’s a cool emoticon: (V) (;,;) (V) it’s ZOIDBERG!!
  8. This guy came up to me and said he needed a glass of water but his pants were on fire so, he probably was lying about needing it.
  9. I have Attention Deficit Disorder. I get distracted easily because my head… SHOULDERS, KNEES, AND TOES! KNEES AND TOES!
  10. FACT: Mimes always scream when you kick them in the balls.
  11. Any psycho girls wanna hang out? Just text me like 5000 times and let me know.
  12. If you could choose between ending World Hunger or Bill Gates’ money, what color would your Lamborghini be?
  13. Sometimes you have to forgive and forget. Forgive them for hurting you and forget that they exist. Move on!
  14. Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else is missing.
  15. The cool thing about The Clapper is it doubles as a strobe light during sex.
  16. If I ever say the phrase “okie dokie artichokie” to you, it means I’m wearing a wire.
  17. Under no circumstances shall a call be made to another male after 2 a.m., unless its to get bailed out of jail.
  18. I hate when people say, ” I gotta get my body right for the summer”..like, wtf are going to do about your face??
  19. The only reason why people hold onto memories is because memories are the only things that don’t change when everyone else does.
  20. It’s a humbling moment when you realize your dog or cat has actually trained you to do something.

Yesterdays Status Updates… | Free Timeline Covers

This Kitty Must Practice Cat-Yoga:

Pringles Kitty

Either that or the kitty eats a well balanced diet 🙂 Share this webgem with your Facebook friends for instant likes, comments,  and general awesomeness.

Guy Has a Laughing Fit On Air:

Classic! That’s a must share video right there 🙂 In case you were wondering that host, Chris Pirillo now has his own Youtube show that’s pretty darn good for tech related stuff.

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