Rhino gets Kicked, Friendship, and 20 Funny Facebook Status Updates

Make your weekend last longer, share one of these…

20 Funny Facebook Status Updates:

  1. Sorry, I’m too poor, I can’t afford to pay attention.
  2. Here’s a joke about ebola, you probably won’t get it though.
  3. Life is so hard when you have twenty TV shows to watch.
  4. The first 80 years of adulthood are always the toughest.
  5. Everything I like is expensive, illegal, or won’t text me back.
  6. Ways to tell a woman is mad at you:
    1. She is silent.
    2. She is yelling.
    3. She acts different.
    4. She acts the same.
    5. She kills you.
  7. I sincerely do not want your opinion.
  8. There are no bad photos. That’s just how you look sometimes.
  9. The mascara wand hits your cheek as you’re finishing your makeup = Just go back to bed.
  10. It’s getting harder and harder to tell Dog the Bounty Hunter and his wife apart.
  11. Every Chrysler commercial should begin with them apologizing for the PT Cruiser.
  12. Making fun of dinosaurs to a paleontologist is a great way to get jurasskicked.
  13. Isn’t it weird that after 30,000 years of eating bread, everyone is gluten allergic now?
  14. 1. Go to police station 2. Say a gang mugged you 3. Describe your own relatives to police sketch artist 4. Claim free family portrait
  15. How many bad decisions are you gonna make until I become one?
  16. In my defense your honor, he said prolly.
  17. To find your prince you need to kiss a few frogs not sleep with the whole pond.
  18. Can’t stop drinking about you.
  19. Never, ever ask a woman if she’s pregnant unless you see an actual baby being born. Even then, act surprised.
  20. I’m awkward when people compliment me. “Nice hair” “Thanks, I grew it myself”

Witty Status | Yesterdays Status Updates…

Rhino Gets Kicked by His Buddy Giraffe…

I don’t know why but, I watched that way too many times. I feel like they’re best friends and rhino was teasing him just a bit too much.

Tons more status updates, funny pictures, and videos… On our Fan Page & Download our Free iPhone App. We’ll see you back on Monday for more Funny Facebook Status Updates 🙂