Happy Monday! Make your Facebook Friends laugh by posting these fresh & funny..
Hilarious Status Updates:
- I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in. (From our Funny Status Updates iPhone App ★★★★★)
With age comes new skills. You can laugh, cough, sneeze and pee all at the same time.
Duct tape is like ‘The Force’. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
- When I say I want someone with a sense of humor I mean I want someone with MY sense of humor.
It is hard to face the problem, when the problem is your face.
- I shouldn’t take it so personally when another car passes me.
The young know the rules, the old know the exceptions.
I thought about going into politics but I could never cheat on my wife. (Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page)
Do not add me on Facebook, then message me saying “do I know you?”
- If hot wheels designed the tracks I’d watch NASCAR.
- I’m not a stalker, I’m just bad with goodbyes.
Many people lose their tempers merely from seeing you keep yours.
It’s O.K. to laugh during sex … just don’t point !
My next house will have no kitchen—just vending machines and a large trash can. (From our Twitter:@FreeFunnyStuff)
Yesterday, all my problems seemed so far away. Today, you’re here. Coincidence?
Thousands More Funny Status Updates…
Haha, what an awesome dog! Post that one on your Facebook wall for some quality comments/likes!
Funny Video to Post:
Kids will be kids! Post that one on your wall with the caption, “Facebook you’re doing it wrong” 😉
Want more funny status updates, awesome pictures, and epic videos? “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App. Visit our awesome *NEW* Funny Status section for thousands of Facebook statuses to choose from!