Happy Monday! Make your Facebook Friends laugh by posting these fresh & funny..
Hilarious Status Updates:
- I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in. (From our Funny Status Updates iPhone App ★★★★★)
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With age comes new skills. You can laugh, cough, sneeze and pee all at the same time.
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Duct tape is like ‘The Force’. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
- When I say I want someone with a sense of humor I mean I want someone with MY sense of humor.
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It is hard to face the problem, when the problem is your face.
- I shouldn’t take it so personally when another car passes me.
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The young know the rules, the old know the exceptions.
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I thought about going into politics but I could never cheat on my wife. (Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page)
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Do not add me on Facebook, then message me saying “do I know you?”
- If hot wheels designed the tracks I’d watch NASCAR.
- I’m not a stalker, I’m just bad with goodbyes.
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Many people lose their tempers merely from seeing you keep yours.
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It’s O.K. to laugh during sex … just don’t point !
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My next house will have no kitchen—just vending machines and a large trash can. (From our Twitter:@FreeFunnyStuff)
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Yesterday, all my problems seemed so far away. Today, you’re here. Coincidence?
Thousands More Funny Status Updates…
Smiling Dog:
Haha, what an awesome dog! Post that one on your Facebook wall for some quality comments/likes!
Funny Video to Post:
[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9gHC3geiU5w[/youtube]
Kids will be kids! Post that one on your wall with the caption, “Facebook you’re doing it wrong” 😉
Want more funny status updates, awesome pictures, and epic videos? “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App. Visit our awesome *NEW* Funny Status section for thousands of Facebook statuses to choose from!