Must Resist, Mediocre Kitty, and Witty Status Posts

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Witty Status Updates for Facebook:

  • Without that little voice in your head, you wouldn’t be able to read this. ( 100K+ Statuses: Funny Status 2  5★ Ratings)
  • Most people don’t know this, but you can quietly be a Republican or a Democrat.
  • Do gun manuals have Trouble Shooting sections?
  • Don’t judge someone because they sin differently than you.
  • Why people use Twitter: because updating 100 times a day on Facebook is not socially acceptable.
  • A woman who has no idea how hot she is, is so hot.
  • I always eat tacos over another tortilla, so when stuff falls out BOOM extra taco. #FoodTip
  • Once you get past my charm, good looks, intelligence and my sense of humor, I think it’s my modesty that stands out.  (Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page )
  • Oh, you sent me an event invite on Facebook? We’ve never met and you live 2,400 miles away, of course I’ll go!!
  • That’s definitely not my ringtone, but I’m going to have to check my phone anyway.
  • It’s only a matter of time until “Security Cameras of Wal-Mart” is a reality TV show.
  • My bucket list: 4 drumsticks, 2 thighs, 2 mashed potatoes with gravy, and 2 biscuits. Extra crispy.
  • It’d be pretty messed up if the cure for cancer was in those end-slices of bread.   (Twitter: @FreeFunnyStuff ) 
  • Together we can stop bathroom mirror profile pictures.

Mediocre Kitty thinks all is Mediocre:

Mediocre Kitty

 

Adorable Puppy Must Resist Eating Treat…

Well jeez louise, that poor lil’ puppy! At least he finally got his treat.. in the most adorable of fashions 🙂 Share this viral video with your Facebook friends to score some more likes!

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