Interweb Senstation, Lonely Pet, and Witty Status Updates

Clever things to say, share these…

20 Witty Facebook Status Updates:

  1. The higher pitched my “hey!” the greater the chance I don’t remember who you are.
  2. Dignity: Is that thing you lose when you send someone a second text before they’ve answered the first.
  3. If you met my friends, you would understand.
  4. I work hard so my dog can have a better life.
  5. PHONE: Has thousands of songs.
    ME: Listens to same 5 songs on repeat.
  6. It’s not weird to talk to yourself, it’s just weird when someone else hears you talking to yourself.
  7. I wish there was a pen that could copy and paste.
  8. Work hard, stay positive, and good things will happen.
  9. Downloading
    *downloading failed* KILL ME NOW.
  10. I feel like school isn’t even about learning anymore, it’s about getting good grades.
  11. If you cry loudly enough, your boss will usually let you go home.
  12. I now have more electronic screens in my life than friends.
  13. You know it’s a really good bar when there’s a couple outside breaking up.
  14. Password must contain at least one capital letter, the meaning of life, 14 of your favorite baby names, the Hamlet plot summary and a hug.
  15. We’re all addicted to something that takes away the pain.
  16. Appreciate what you have. Work your ass off for what you want.
  17. Theirye’re, problem solved.
  18. If your single and you know it…Pet your cat!
  19. The statement ‘Hey! Calm down!’ has a zero to no success rate of getting someone to calm down.
  20. Down on yourself for being lazy? Keep in mind the Greeks believed their GODS lived atop a very hikeable mountain and no one went to check.

Yesterdays Status Updates…

The NEW Internet Celebrity, Jammie Ragsdale, everybody…


LOL, such personality! Love it 🙂 Share if you also enjoyed it.

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