Make someone laugh, share these…
- All I want is some ketchup packets placed in the bag, without having to ask!
- Dear whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office – I will track you down. You have my Word.
- If you mix Taco Bell hot sauce into your ramen, it tastes exactly like poverty.
- That awkward moment when you finish reading a page and you have no idea what you just read.
- Don’t waste my timeline.
- If your cat really loved you it would be a dog.
- One in three Americans weigh as much as the other two.
- I didn’t text you last weekend…Jack Daniels did.
- I love doing stupid things with my friends. Best memories ever.
- Me: Wow everything is going perfect for once!
Life: haha one sec.
- My life has a great cast, but I can’t really figure out the plot.
- Patience is not one of my virtues. Hell, what am I talking about? Virtue is not one of my virtues.
- $100 says I don’t have a gambling problem.
- Wanna make someone feel uncomfortable? After shaking their hand slowly lift your hand to your nose and say, Mmm.
- You never learn anything by doing it right.
- If you don’t like being tailgated then don’t play movies I like.
- I DROPPED MY BABY!! The battery popped out and not a scratch on the touchscreen WHEW
- Maybe she’s born with them. Maybe they’re made of saline.
- Somehow, going into The Dollar Store and asking for a price check just never gets old.
- You auto complete me.
Wish I was there! Looks like so much fun 🙂 Share if you enjoyed.