Make your weekend last longer by sharing these funny status updates with your Facebook friends!
Funny Status Updates for Facebook:
A bank is a place that will lend you money, if you can prove that you don’t need it. (Courtesy of our 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone/iPod App)
- If I’m ever on life support, I hope they remember to try switching me off and then back on again.
- “Username or Password Incorrect” You couldn’t just tell me which one?
- Does AT&T allow phone calls on their network? Anyone know?
- The wise man sees but does not speak. The fool sees but speaks anyway. Then what does that make the blind mute?
- Trouble defies the law of gravity. It’s easier to pick up than to drop.
- At the planetarium with my family. I think my wife was surprised to discover she’s not the center of the universe.
- How hard can it be to proof red a status? ツ (Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page)
- The amount of sleep required by the average person is five minutes more. ~Wilson Mizener
- Knowledge is power. If you know it about the right person. (VIA our Tweeter:@FreeFunnyStuff )
- Surely I’m not the only who chews extra hard to make sure the Teddy Grahams are good and dead. Surely.
- To make a lot of money is my one goal in life. Turns out my laziness and lack of ambition is a really good goalie.
- This morning I put Red Bull into my coffee maker instead of water and now I can see noises.
Funny Picture to post to your Facebook wall or Profile:
Funny Video to post:
If you still need more funny status updates, pics, and videos to post: “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App and visit our new sister website WittyStatus where you can submit statuses and vote on them! Have a safe weekend, cya Monday for more Funny Statuses!