Be the Facebook Celebrity you’ve always dreamed of by posting these…
Awesome Status Updates:
- Facebook is a substitute for real human interaction, which explains its popularity. (From our Funny Status Updates iPhone App ★★★★★)
- This STATUS is not meant for you. Look away. STOP LOOKING AT IT!
- I want to be elected president, learn the truth about aliens, and then resign.
Gossip is when you hear something you like about someone you don’t.
I’m not myself today. Maybe I’m you.
Smith & Wesson: The original point and click interface.
- “I high fived a shark, and then we ate burritos.” – Martin Luther King Jr.’s other dream.
I graduated with a 4.0 … Blood Alcohol level.
- You should never live in the past. Unless you’re a time traveler. Cause dinosaurs rule.
- My wife had auto correct long before iPhone. (Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page)
- Face down, ass up, that’s the way babies often sleep. Adorable!
- I always choose Pepsi over Coca-Cola because I prefer my soda dehyphenated.
- Apparently this is the letter “v” in Chinese: 维 … Lets see you try to fly in that shape American birds.
- You’re her boyfriend?! That’s cool! I’m her manfriend!
Everyone has the right to be stupid, but you are abusing the privilege! (VIA:@FreeFunnyStuff)
Don’t make me use UPPERCASE.
Feel Good Status of the Day: You can tell the quality of a person by how they treat people they don’t need.
Yesterdays Funny Status Updates…
Dog walks on water…
Gee that must be a cold lake!
Lady Speaks Cat in this new viral commercial:
LOL, that one will get a strong reaction out of your Facebook friends!
Want more funny status updates, awesome pictures, and epic videos? “Like” our FB Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App. Visit our *NEW* Funny Status section for thousands of Facebook statuses to choose from!