Fancy Raccoon, Student Typewriter, and Laugh-tastic Status Updates

Score more likes, share these…

20 Laugh-Tastic Facebook Statuses:

  1. Lazy Rule: Can’t reach it, don’t need it.
  2. I want to meet the teenage versions of my parents.
  3. Whenever I delete text messages, I feel like I’m deleting evidence.
  4. I hope Karma smacks some people before I do.
  5. I have learned that pleasing everyone is impossible…but pissing everyone off is easy and fun as hell!
  6. Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get.
  7. Sometimes there just isn’t a right side of the bed.
  8. Life is tough, get a dog.
  9. It’s amazing how many problems go away by simply ignoring them and going to sleep.
  10. It is now day 15 of the shutdown. Since the national parks are closed, nobody is monitoring the cougars so please put a leash on your mom.
  11. When going on a roller coaster bring nuts and bolts, lean to the person in front and say… “Woah dude, these came out of your seat!”
  12. Choose your friends carefully, They are the one who tag you in photos.
  13. Me: You’re the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen.
    Her: You just want to have sex with me.
    Me: And you’re smart too, I like that.
  14. First thing I do when I realize I’m lost…turn the radio down.
  15. Tripping over an object, then verbally abusing it.
  16. Music always helps, no matter what you’re going through.
  17. The only reason nice guys finish last is because they’re holding the door for everyone else.
  18. When picking a ringtone, ask yourself: “How embarrassed will I be when this rings?
  19. Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze?
  20. Women are angels, and when someone breaks our wings, we continue to fly…on a broomstick. We’re flexible that way.

Yesterdays Status Updates…

Raccoon in a Tuxedo…

racoon in a tuxedo

He’s a Fancy one!

Student Brings Typewriter to Class:

Going old school! All kidding aside that was pretty funny, share if you’d like.

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1 COMMENT

  1. Those who have lives of their own..don’t have to time to spend all their time worrying about what is going on in everyone else’s…get a hobby….

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