Epic Status Updates for the Weekend & Bonus Prank Video!

Get popular on Facebook by posting these hilarious…

Funny Status Updates for Facebook:

  • Without Facebook, I probably wouldn’t have wished you a happy birthday. (From our JUST UPDATED  and really awesome: 4.5-star Rated Funny Status Updates iPhone/iPod App)
  • When people say “I’m not getting any younger!” I wonder what other basic life concepts they just learned.
  • I just got carded at Forever 21. This is crap!
  • If your fountain soda machine is self serve, I’m just going to assume I get unlimited refills.
  • If ‘Guns don’t kill people, people kill people’, does that mean toasters don’t toast toast, toast toast toast?
  • Some people should come with subtitles. ツ (Source: 16k+ Funny Status Update Fan Page)
  • The person who says he trusts no one should include himself.
  • Writing. Like. This. Doesn’t. Make. Your. Point. Any. Stronger. It. Makes. It. Look. Like. Your. Computer. Has. Asthma.
  • The right to be heard does not automatically include the right to be taken seriously.
  • When you’re asked “How are you?” and you respond with anything but “good” it always becomes awkward
  • Sign seen in a bar: “Those drinking to forget please pay in advance.”
  • Women and tax forms have a lot in common…Men love to cheat on them.
  • Love is all fun and games until someone loses an eye or gets pregnant.
  • I was going to buy a copy of The Power of Positive Thinking, and then I thought, what good would that do?
  • Sometimes the best helping hand you can give is a good, firm push. (VIA our Tweeter:@FreeFunnyStuff )
  • Fact: If you sneak away to fart loudly in private and get caught by some innocent person walking by, you have to now hate that person.
  • Some old people are driving vehicles right now and don’t even know it.

Awesome LA Times Article: Women who post lots of photos of themselves on Facebook value appearance, need attention, study finds

Funny Picture to Post:

Funny Tracy Morgan Quote

Funny Video for your Facebook Profile:


Next time you think this is happening to you at the grocery store, you’re probably on a hidden camera!

Have a wonderful weekend and please join us Monday for more hilarious content. If you still need more funny status updates, pics, and videos to post:  “Like” our FB Fan PageDownload our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App and visit our new sister website WittyStatus where you can submit statuses and vote on them!