Make Wednesday Fun, Share these…
Genius Status Updates for Facebook:
- Sleep is like sex, you never get enough of it and sometimes it feels like it never happened at all.
- One day, people are gonna write songs about the nap I’m about to take.
- Sometimes a person is completely out of the picture but you just can’t let go of the frame.
- Finding out your ex got fat is like finding 20 bucks in your pocket. Not life changing but definitely puts a smile on your face.
- Never trust a married guys opinion of who’s hot. It’s like asking a starving guy what food tastes good.
- The secret to a successful lemonade stand is vodka.
- When a guy texts a girl “hey stranger”, what he really means is “I’ve recently thought about trying to get in your pants again.”
- I mixtape love you.
- That awkward moment when you show someone something really funny & they don’t think it’s funny at all.
- I hate that feeling when you close your eyes to apply shampoo, and get paranoid that someone might kill you in the shower.
- True friends don’t judge each other…. They judge other people, together.
- I worry about the future because I know my friends that are teachers.
- Me after just cleaning my room:
Wow, I am never letting my room get messy again!
The next day:
Has anyone seen my bed?
- Horror movies don’t scare me. 5 missed calls from mom scares me.
- Online dating creeps me out! I’ll stick with good old-fashioned prison penpals.
- Thinks its should be illegal to do construction, mow, and/or weed whack before noon!
- College is the only time in which being poor and drunk is acceptable.
- Hell hath no fury like a woman whom you won’t let see a picture of her you just took.
- Anyone want to be friends with benefits? Like we’ll give each other rides to the airport and help each other move but still be just friends.
- The line between sleeping in my clothes and wearing the clothes I slept in has blurred.
The “Blah Blah Dog”…
He really doesn’t like you talking 🙂 He’s clearly bored of you. Share if you enjoyed.
Tons more status updates, funny pictures, and videos… On our Fan Page & Download our 4.5-star Rated iPhone App.