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Funny Facebook Statuses Galore:
- Just ate a whole bag of chips, but it was “reduced fat” so basically it was like going to the gym.
- I hope my last words aren’t “What does this thing do?”
- That awkward moment when someone skinnier than you says “I’m so fat.” and you stand there like (-_-)
- Laughing so hard no noise comes out so you just sit there clapping like a idiotic seal.
- I don’t care how old I am. If I lose my Mom in the supermarket I will panic.
- Erase the messages, delete the numbers and move on. You don’t have to forget them but just accept that they aren’t that person anymore.
- Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
- “Do you want to try a bite of mine?” “Nope. I ordered what I like.”
- A house isn’t a home unless there’s wifi.
- Showers: never want to get in, then never wanting to get out.
- It’s funny how 1 text, 1 song, 1 mistake, 1 lie, 1 truth, and 1 person could change your mood in 1 second.
- If you call shot gun while being arrested it should be respected.
- Facebook etiquette: Thou shall not hold a conversation under someone’s status post.
- An “ear of corn” looks nothing like an ear.
- Does anyone else get bothered by that last inch the shower curtain wont cover?
- In my next life, I’d like to come back as someone who has a life.
- Fun Fact of the day… A computer keyboard has more bacteria than a toilet seat.
- If slow-walkers only knew the pain of the fast-walkers trapped behind them, they may just speed it up a little.
- I hate it when you drink water and the ice attacks your face.
- My neighbor knocked on my door at three in the morning! Can you believe that? Lucky for him I was still up playing my drums.
If I Fits I Sits…
What’d you get yourself into this time Kitty??? Dawwwwww, I’ll help you again 😉
Interrogating a Baby:
What an adorable little one 🙂 Perfect for her debut role in CSI: Sesame Street.