Baffled Boxer 20 Funny Statuses: f puppies could talk I would never even want to try and make human friends ever again. Shout out to weathermen telling us the barometric pressure like we know what the hell to do with that information. It’s called “Biscotti” because nobody would buy “chocolate covered croutons”. Whenever I have […]
Statuses
Safety First, 20 Statuses, Ellen Scares Eric Stonestreet
Safety First Safety is obviously her main concern. 20 Funny Statuses: Trying to finish a dream by going back to sleep! Looking at your best friend and laughing uncontrollably for no reason When you text someone to say you are outside their house instead of knocking. A smile is a curve that sets everything straight! […]
Nerds In The Yard, Statuses to Steal, & Supercats
My Pokemon brings all the nerds to the yard.. Never trade your Charizard.. 20 Funny Status Updates Worth Stealing: “Don’t make me regret this.” -things I think when accepting a friend request. Did some financial planning and it looks like I can retire at 62 and live comfortably for eleven minutes. Am I the only […]
Self Portraits, Silly Statuses, Wake Up Lady!
Pigeon to Picasso Talk about good aim! 20 Silly Statuses: I like to stop the microwave with 1 second to go. Makes me feel like a bomb defusal expert. I like holding the door for people who are far away, you know so they have to run a little. If you ever get caught sleeping […]
Baby Interrogation, KittEhh Fits, and Statuses Galore
Score more likes, share these… Funny Facebook Statuses Galore: Just ate a whole bag of chips, but it was “reduced fat” so basically it was like going to the gym. I hope my last words aren’t “What does this thing do?” That awkward moment when someone skinnier than you says “I’m so fat.” and you […]
Roof Party Gangnam Style, ScarJo, and Funny Statuses
Welcome to November. Score some LIKES, share these.. Funny Statuses for Facebook: Friendships must be built on a solid foundation of alcohol, sarcasm, inappropriateness, and shenanigans. . ( 100K+ Statuses: Funny Status 2 5★ Ratings) I crush up cheetos, pour the dust into a salt shaker, and sprinkle it on everything. How do you know someone is from […]