Get more likes, share these…
20 Nifty Status Updates for Facebook:
- You can celebrate Valentine’s Day with your heart, I’ll celebrate with my liver.
- 1. Denial 2. Anger 3. Bargaining 4. Depression 5. Acceptance……… The 5 stages of buying gas.
- I wonder if there are birds that prefer not to sing in the morning and that just roll around in their nests until noon.
- If I procrastinated any harder right now, it would have to involve time travel.
- The only thing I know about women is that they have lots of feelings and they’re not afraid to tell you about each and every one of them.
- Word of advice: Never trust a person who doesn’t like dogs.
- Dear Phone, maybe if you didn’t light up so many damn times telling me you had a low battery, you wouldn’t have died so quickly!
- If I’m texting you first, you’re doing something right…or you’re hot.
- 23 guys did not “like” your picture because your “pretty” they liked it because you’re almost completely naked.
- Socializing = Nod. Smile. Ask inane question. Pretend to listen. Repeat.
- The older I get, the more I enjoy being bored.
- This Valentine’s day, I will confess my feelings for my one and true love…Beer.
- Still waiting for that, “bump into the girl of my dreams causing all her stuff to spill” moment.
- Facebook etiquette: Thou shall not hold a conversation under someone’s status post.
- LIKE if you laugh harder when you try to explain why you’re laughing.
- If you storm out on your boyfriend during an argument, remember to grab your phone charger. Having to go back in for it ruins all the drama.
- Some women should have their eyeshadow privileges revoked.
- I hate when cashiers ask you if that’s everything. Oh no, I’d also like all this invisible shit.
- There was a therapist on TV talking about the importance of having a reward system in place for when your child behaves. I remember having that with my parents, it was called “not getting your ass beat”!
- Anger is an emotion for people who wish to control others while simultaneously failing to control themselves.
Upside down KitteHhh is confused…
If you thought that was cool – try uʍop ǝpısdn status updates 🙂 guaranteed to get a ton of likes!
Goats that Yell Like Humans (Not Kidding)
That was a little bit funny, little scary, and a lot of awesome. Two words… MUST SHARE!
Make sure to stop by tomorrow for a special Valentines Day Status Updates selection 🙂