Undercover Arnold, Dog Cuddles Girl, and Classic Status Updates

Welcome to Wednesday, share these…

20 Classic Never-Fail Facebook Status Updates:

  1. That terribly awkward moment when you’re creeping through someone’s Instagram and you accidentally double tap on a post from 23weeks ago.
  2. Time is the coin of life. Only you can determine how it will be spent.
  3. Telling the truth when you can get away with a lie will make me respect you.
  4. You know how after you get off a boat, your body still feels like its on the boat for a while after? I’m like that with beds.
  5. I’d watch a show that was nothing but paternity test result reactions.
  6. You’d think my password was “yourmom” because my computer just told me it was too easy.
  7. Stop looking for reasons you are not happy. Focus on the things you do have, and the reasons you should be happy.
  8. Alcohol – The best night time: slurring, headache, dehydration, drink spilling, charm killing, so you think you can dance “medicine.”
  9. The awkward moment when you catch yourself singing a song that you’re supposed to hate.
  10. Just put on 12 Nickelback songs and walked out of the bar.
  11. Autocorrect is a who’re!
  12. Wish breaking up with someone meant they had to refund all the money you spent on them.
  13. Has that kid in the Dreamworks logo even caught a single fish yet?
  14. Why isn’t the movie ‘What Women Want’ just 90 minutes of Ryan Gosling doing an ab workout on a pile of Nutella and money?
  15. Don’t wear skinny jeans, if you have no skinny genes.
  16. 20 years from now, some adults are going to say they grew up on the “bad part of town,” meaning there was no 4G in that area.
  17. If watching the big-screen TV with your pants off and a bag of Doritos is wrong, then they shouldn’t have couches at this Best Buy.
  18. If it hurts when you pee, urine trouble.
  19. Her: My eyes are up here.
    Me: Mine aren’t.
  20. I really don’t want a birthday card. Just give me the $4 you would’ve spent on it. If it makes you feel better sign your name on each dollar.

Yesterdays Status Updates…

Dog Cuddles Girl…

dog cuddles girl.

Well that’s just ridiculous! If you want to read the backstory, check it out.

Arnold Schwarzenegger goes Undercover @ Golds Gym:

That was hilarious! Could you imagine?!?! As always, please share if you enjoyed 🙂

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