Make the weekend last longer, share these…
20 Clever Facebook Statuses for the Weekend:
- Taking a nap is always so risky like when will I wake up? in thirty minutes? in 3 hours? in 9 years?? no one can be sure.
- Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.
- It’s crazy how nicely the people of different countries get along with each other, without their politicians screwing things up horribly.
- The USA declared war on terror and drugs and there is more drugs and terror now. Next we should declare war on jobs and money, just saying.
- Sorry I pissed you off, but I find you much more entertaining this way.
- Never send in a beer to do the work of a tequila shot.
- I’d like to hang out, but that would get in the way of me being home and doing absolutely nothing.
- That awkward moment when you didn’t notice I spelt awkward wrong… No I didn’t, but you checked before reading this didn’t you?
- The further you push me away, the more I begin to enjoy viewing you from a distance.
- Why is it that when ever you smell somethin funny in your car, the first thing you do is turn down the radio?
- Everyone should have a drag queen level of self-confidence.
- The best password cracking software is called a pissed off ex.
- Back in my day, we didn’t have Instagram. We had to bore people in person with photo albums.
- Be that Shopping Cart with the bad wheel. Go in your own direction no matter how hard someone try’s to push you in theirs.
- Leaving a watermelon on someone’s doorstep in the middle of night is a pretty inexpensive way to occupy a portion of their mind forever.
- It’s amazing how the lowly potato gives us potato chips, french fries, and vodka. Get your shit together, every other vegetable.
- If the voices in my head had a British accent I would listen to them more often.
- I hate people who use big words just to make themselves look perspicacious.
- During the stone age, long before Facebook, man was already experiencing the desire to express on a wall what he had eaten.
- If your cat really loved you it would be a dog.
KittEh sez Surprise…
I like how they just reset when it’s done.
Dog Thinks He’s an Ambulance…
Nice impression, puppy!