This week on FB, share one…
Top 20 Facebook Statuses:
- If there’s an emoji by your name in my phone, you’re doing something right.
- Sometimes music is all you need.
- My mind says go to the gym but my heart says food.
- I’ve probably learned more from Google than I have from school.
- *owns tons of clothes*
*wears same three things*
- Do you ever do something mildly impolite like not give a nice goodbye or not hold a door and spend the rest of the day thinking about it?
- Nothing makes me more sad and mad than seeing the nicest people being treated like crap.
- Kids, try dealing with bullies the way I did: Grow up to be smarter, wealthier and better looking than them and then add them on Facebook.
- That message felt like a great idea until I hit send.
- That awkward moment when you’re walking and then you start thinking about how you’re walking and you feel like you’re walking weird.
- Remember, an easily stolen ADT security sign placed on your lawn is the first line of defense against crime.
- Sexually rubbing the wall until you find the light switch.
- They need to put more spider poison in hairspray.
- The only person I’d ever take love advice from is that French candlestick from Beauty and the Beast.
- I don’t trust joggers, it’s a little too convenient that they are always the ones to discover dead bodies.
- As an adult, I use nunchucks way less than I expected.
- The “Slow Children Playing” signs always make me sad. Would it cost that much more to thrown in punctuation?
- If people are talking behind your back, then just fart.
- Irony of Life: Wives don’t get pregnant after many attempts, And girlfriends get pregnant even after taking precautions.
- I want someone to look at me the way I look at the waiter when he brings my meal.
Just in time for summer, needed that!
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