Make Hump Day fun, share one of these..
20 Pro Facebook Status Updates:
- Fate is when you find something you were never looking for and realize its everything you never knew you wanted.
- As soon as you think “maybe I can get up early and just finish it tomorrow” you’ve already lost.
- Was hating my job until I drove past a grown man dressed as a Taco on the side of the road. Thanks again Perspective.
- The only stock options I have are chicken and beef.
- You kids nowadays are so lucky. In my day we only had front facing cameras. Very hard to take a selfie.
- I can see exactly 5 years into the future. I have 2020 vision.
- Cheese is basically happiness that you can melt.
- I think my problem is that I have really fantastic bad ideas…
- This guy at the gym just did 3 sets of selfies.
- Humor is of two types – below the belt and above the forehead.
- Your voicemail will be ignored in the order in which it was received. Beep.
- I’m starting to think that some of you are misspelling words on porpoise.
- You better not pout, you better not cry, you better not shout I’m telling you why…we have our own problems and nobody cares about yours.
- I have an inferiority complex about my superiority complex. I know I’m better than you, but I feel really bad about it.
- I don’t want to rule the world… Just everything within a hundred square mile radius.
- I will kill you with kindness even if I have to beat the shit out of you.
- Eat like nobody is watching. Or dance. Whatever.
- I wish I could lose weight as easily as I lose my keys, phone, chapstick and, on occasion, my sanity.
- JUST came up with a witty comeback for that thing you said 2 days ago!
- I want my eyelashes to be as black as my soul and as long as the list of people I hate.
Witty Status | Yesterdays Status Updates…
Smart Chimp Solves Interesting Problem:
[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPz6uvIbWZE[/youtube]
How many of you would have been able to solve that?? Such amazing creatures!
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