Salesman Comedian, Awkward Relationships, & Great Statuses

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GREAT Status Updates for Facebook:

  • That awesome moment when you say something really funny and everyone laughs, so you just sit there like a boss.  (From our 4.5Star Rated: ★★★★★ iPhone App ★★★★★)
  • The problem with reality is a lack of background music.
  • After sending a risky text, one minute seems like an eternity.
  • That awkward moment when you’re scuba diving and you see Adele rolling in the deep.
  • Best invention ever; a mirror that takes pictures
  • To hate a person is a waste; half the people you hate don’t care, and the other half don’t know.
  • Some people need to realize that Facebook is a social network, not a diary.
  • Nothing changes a Facebook relationship status faster than a weekend full of tagged photos!  (176+Likes in 15minutes – Source: Funny Status Update Fan Page )
  • All I want is less to do, more time to do it, and higher pay for not getting it done.
  • Requesting a table in the “Hot Waitress” section should be socially acceptable.
  • Turning off the downstairs lights and running upstairs so no one kills you…
  • Never underestimate my power to get absolutely nothing done all day.
  • Ameri-fact: Mitt is actually short for Mittens Romney.
  • That awkward moment when you know something but you don’t know how to explain it.
  • You know what’s huge in Japan? Sumo wrestlers. (From Twitter: @FreeFunnyStuff )
  • Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

Relationships on Facebook gone Bad…

Facebook Cousin Relationship

Forever Alone! Just one of many awkward Facebook relationship statuses that you’ll come across in 2012.

Pure Comedy Gold:


Would you buy from this guy if he came to your door?  Share with your Facebook friends and see what they think of this guys sales pitch.

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