Role Reversal, Tables Turning, and Clever Status Posts

Editorial Team

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One of these will make you chuckle, so share the love…

20 Realllllyyyy Clever Facebook Status Posts:

I wish we could donate body fat to those in need.
No matter how nice I ask random people, nobody will take me to Funkytown.
Texting is a brilliant way to miscommunicate how you feel, and misinterpret what other people mean.
Diet tip: your pants will never get too tight if you don’t wear any.
Behind every good selfie is approximately 47 nearly identical pictures that didn’t make the cut.
You’re beautiful. I hope you have a shitty personality so I don’t have to like you.
I can make your gf scream louder than you can. – Spider
You can kill your attraction to anyone by watching them chew.
Hell is a never-ending Instagram account of a girl who just got a new boyfriend.
My boss said “Dress for the job you want, not the job you have.” Now I’m sitting in a disciplinary meeting dressed as Batman.
I like my movies like I like my women. Almost anything new will satisfy me.
Sometimes, I Simba the shit out of my pets.
A group of bad decisions is called My Life.
Have you ever given your number to someone before and 3 texts later you think “I really shouldn’t have done that….”?
A drunk mouth speaks a sober mind.
You know my name, not my story. You’ve heard what I’ve done, not what I’ve been through. If you were in my shoes, you’d fall the first step.
Why can’t I cry money instead of tears?
I can’t hang out tomorrow I’m too busy doing nothing alone sorry.
I look either mad or tired all the time.
I hate songs that are like 75% bad but the chorus is so good that you suffer through the whole song just to hear one part like three times.